New look for the blog and a change of attitude

You may have noticed that the blog looks a bit different, I felt it needed a spring clean, I might make a few more changes yet, I took away the tabs at the side and may replace them with new images when I get time, there is a new banner and profile pic, and a new tab along the top - recipes.  I hope you like it!
As for the change of attitude, I felt bad after the last post, it was so negative and although it was how I was feeling that day and possibly everything I said was legitimate I have decided that I want this blog to be more about the person I would LIKE to be than jumping on random moments of anger or annoyance.

When I dwell on negativity it makes me feel bad and I am sure you readers find no joy from me ranting,

If I want to be happy then I need to spread happiness,

So that's the plan for the moment, do you think it's a good one?

What this blog is all about

This might sound really silly but the other day I realised what this blog is all about.  I had been feeling all bothered about not having a singular voice or a focus for the blog.  I wanted it to be cohesive, but felt it came across as muddled and without direction because of all my separate interests, ideas and aspects to my life.
It hit me whilst browsing some other blogs about parenting; The Minimalist Mom,  The imagination tree and Little eco footprints.  And now, having seen the way other people come across on their blogs, I can explain the content of my blog with one wonderful word, Alternative.  Let me explain first by examining what I see as being the opposite to "Alternative":
The Anti-to my "alternative" can be encompassed in three words; conventional, mainstream and conformist.  I see these things as following the status-quo, not questioning, accepting the way things are, not hoping for change.  Also, (perhaps rather more controversially) I see this way of life as being Capitalist; a life in which on strives for always more money and/or power; consumerism.
 My life, and this blog is about getting more of other things in my life than money, stuff and power.  More love, more joy, more peace, greater satisfaction, better relationships, greater autonomy,  more self-reliance when it comes to material things, better quality of life. And in so doing, following a way of life which is alternative to the mainstream of what most people do; challenging what is the norm and being more mindful of the planet as I do so.  Putting this into practical terms means my blog is about:

• Trying to be financially self-sufficient through working for myself, selling my wares (Art, crafts) and my skills (teaching, photography),
• Trying to be more environmentally friendly and self-sufficient through growing my own veg (Allotment), making things rather than buying them (crafts) and doing things that help the environment, or at the least cause it less damage,
• Following alternative parenting approaches, (attachment parenting, eco-parenting)
• Differentiating myself from secular, mainstream society, living a "good" life, (Christianity) 
• Thinking about life, the world and everything in a different way, not conforming to how society expects me to behave, act, dress etc.

And all these things are of course interconnecting, so it looks something like this:

A bit messy I know, but that's just me!

So in summary, this blog is about my life...my Alternative life.  

Hope you like it!

Finding my voice

I have been feeling frustrated with my blog recently and getting all bothered about how many visitors I am getting, how many comments, how many followers etc, and concluding that it's not many.  So I have been reading up on how to improve your blog and get more hits.  Most say that you need to find your own voice and be authentic and I am finding it a real struggle to find my voice.  I read other blogs and think to myself I want to be more like Elsie on Beautiful Mess and not reveal much about my private life, my feelings and just focus on the crafts, doing posts that are fun and quick and easy to read, not too meaningful, fairly light, with lots of pictures, but then I think but that's not me, I am deeper than that,  if I try to be like Elsie then I am not being authentic or using my voice.  So then I think I know I will be more like Kelly Rae Roberts and be really descriptive about my feelings and gush and be all about the love and the art, but that isn't really me either, I don't like to gush and I don't speak like that and I do lots of other things than just art. Or maybe my blog should be more like Elise Blaha and be like an online diary of everything I do, a document, but then I don't have time for that and don't want to share some things. I get very confused and muddled and I lose myself in the sea of other peoples voices.  I have conversations with myself that go something like this; I know, I will just focus on crafts for my blog, but then I want to include bits about my life too, and my life is also about Art and and photography and my new baby and friends and family and days out and Christianity, and I want to include all these things too, but then my blog looks muddled and doesn't come across as cohesive, I am too eclectic to focus on one area of my life only, maybe I should have lots of blogs, one for each aspect of my life/personality, but I can't separate them, they are all intertwined, the craft inspires the art and the photography reflects life and so on, plus I barely have time for one blog let alone five or six. I want my blog to be a true reflection of me, but I also want followers, I don't want to put people off by being too opinionated about things or focusing too much on one aspect of me that might put people off, like my faith or my baby, no one wants to hear someone gush about their baby all the time, and for goodness sake don't mention politics, but that's me too, I have an opinion, I am educated, I have a degree for crying out loud I need to express who I am in a true way, not in a way I think people will like, but am I brave enough to do that? Can  make that commitment?  Do I even have time? And I don't come to any sort of real conclusion and so I just carry on blogging about whatever and sometimes not blogging at all then feeling sad that I only had 5 visitors today or whatever.  What do you think? What should I do?